Identify Your Attachment Style
Take the assessment, understand your style in depth, and learn to recognize other people’s styles too.
A self-paced online course for individuals and couples
Getting to Secure Attachment
Heal the patterns that keep sabotaging your relationships and build the secure love you want
Just $249. Less than one therapy session.
Get the Course – $249
Instant access. No subscription. Pay once, keep it forever. 14-day money-back guarantee.
Let me guess…
You overthink your relationships constantly. Reading into texts, tone changes, and small shifts in behavior. Part of you is always braced for the moment they pull away, disappoint you, or leave.
Or maybe closeness is the hard part. You shut down during conflict. You pull back when things get emotionally intense. Letting your walls all the way down feels impossible, even with someone you love.
Or you swing between the two. You crave closeness, then panic when you get it. You pull away from the person you most want close, then worry they’ll actually go.
And no matter how hard you try, you keep landing in the same painful patterns. Deep down you’ve wondered: “Why do relationships feel so much harder for me than they seem to for everyone else?”
Here’s the answer. It has less to do with who you are and more to do with the emotional blueprint you learned in childhood. These patterns are not character flaws. They are survival strategies your nervous system built a long time ago to keep you feeling safe and loved. You didn’t choose them. But as an adult, you can change them. We’ve watched clients do it more times than we can count, and we promise it’s possible for you too.
We repeat what we don’t repair.
That’s exactly why we created Getting to Secure Attachment.
What’s my attachment style?
Your attachment style is the emotional blueprint that shapes how you show up in relationships. It develops in early childhood based on how your parents or caregivers responded to your needs for connection, safety, and freedom. It influences how safe love feels, how you handle conflict, how you respond to distance, and the patterns you unconsciously repeat.
There are 4 attachment styles: Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Disorganized (also called Fearful-Avoidant). Everything other than secure is considered insecure attachment.
Insecure attachment
Tends to feel like waiting for the other shoe to drop. Overthinking, fear of abandonment, trouble trusting, shutting down in conflict, or craving love while fearing it at the same time.
Secure attachment
Feels like steady ground. Open communication, easier trust, conflict that doesn’t threaten the whole relationship, closeness without losing yourself.
The good news is, secure attachment can be learned. Psychologists call it earned secure attachment, and it’s possible no matter what your childhood looked like. It changes how you love AND how you let yourself be loved, whether you’re single, dating, or 20 years married.
Introducing
Getting to Secure Attachment
A self-paced online course that walks you through healing insecure attachment, step by step. Each module includes a teaching video, journal prompts, and discussion topics you can do alone or with your partner, from home, on your own schedule.
By the end of this course, you’ll know how to
- Name your attachment style and see your patterns clearly. Once you can see the pattern, it stops running the show.
- Stay connected during conflict instead of spiraling or shutting down. Fight in a way that brings you closer instead of tearing you apart.
- Build real trust and emotional safety. First with yourself, then with the people you love.
Here’s what’s inside
Connection & Vulnerability
Vulnerability is key for creating an authentic and secure connection. We’ll help you identify your personal vulnerabilities and teach you how to be vulnerable (but with boundaries).
The Couple Bubble
How secure couples create a world of two that protects the relationship, whether you’re partnered right now or not.
Boundaries
What they are, how to find yours, and how to voice them without blowing things up.
Discover Your Love Template
Uncover how your childhood shaped who you’re drawn to and how you act in love.
Healthy Communication
Communicate openly, assertively, and non-defensively.
Healthy Conflict
Securely attached individuals are skilled at managing conflict. We’ll teach you how to fight fair and communicate your needs in a healthy way, creating a win-win scenario.
Trust
Build trust and emotional safety, first with yourself and then with others.
These are the same exercises and tools used in real couples therapy sessions at Couples Learn.
If you worked through all of this in therapy sessions, it would take 8 to 10 sessions. At Couples Learn rates, that’s over $2,400. You get the whole course, plus every future update, for $249.
14-day
Money-back
guarantee
guarantee
Instant access. No subscription. Pay once, keep it forever.
What clients say
From people who did the work
“So grateful I stumbled across Couples Learn. Very insightful and thought provoking! Constantly caused me to challenge my thoughts and feelings to ensure they’re grounded in strength to further facilitate self mastery to be a greater me and life partner!”
“The tools are ones that can translate into any aspect of your life. I’m a firm believer that all couples should try this out. Even if things are great, they can always be greater.”
“We learned the toolsets and methods to both develop upon our relationship shortcomings (which all relationships have) and further strengthen the areas where we have already been thriving.”
Who’s behind the course
Created at Couples Learn
Couples Learn is the online therapy practice founded by Dr. Sarah Schewitz, a licensed psychologist who has spent 15+ years helping people heal attachment wounds and build secure relationships. Forbes ranked Couples Learn one of the best online couples therapy platforms.
Meet your teacher
Hanna Stensby, LMFT is a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in healing attachment trauma and creating secure attachments for individuals and couples. Before her work with couples, Hanna worked with adopted children and their families to create secure attachments as they transitioned into their new homes.
As featured in
Is this you
This course is for you if…
- You keep repeating the same painful relationship patterns and you’re ready to understand why
- You overthink your relationships, fear abandonment, or find it hard to fully trust
- Closeness feels overwhelming and you want to stop shutting down on the people you love
- You’re single and want to break your patterns before your next relationship
- You’re in a relationship and want to understand each other’s styles and build a more secure bond together
- You’ve been told (or suspect) you’re “anxiously attached” or “avoidant” and want to actually do something about it
Still got questions
Frequently asked questions
Can I do this course alone, or is it for couples?
Both. The course is written to be helpful for both individuals and couples. Every module includes discussion topics and exercises you can do with a partner, as well as journaling and reflection prompts to do as an individual.
How long do I have access?
Forever. Come back for a refresher at each new stage of your relationship or whenever you enter a new relationship.
How much time does it take?
As little as 30 minutes a week. The modules are short and to the point, and you can go as deep as you want with the journal prompts and discussions. You have lifetime access, so take it at your own pace.
What if it’s not for me? Can I get a refund?
Yes. There’s a 14-day money-back guarantee. If you’re not satisfied within 14 days, you get a full refund.
We’re dealing with some big issues. Is this course enough?
If you’re facing out-of-control fights, betrayal recovery, or deciding whether to stay together, a course probably isn’t enough on its own. It will still give you a strong foundation, and you can book a free consultation to figure out whether therapy is the right next step.
What about a guarantee?
If you’re not 100% satisfied with the course within 14 days, you’ll get a full refund. Take the full 14 days to explore the materials and then make your decision with real information instead of guesswork.
One last thing
You didn’t choose your attachment style. You can choose what comes next.
You didn’t have a say in how you were loved as a kid, but you can change how you love as an adult. The strategies in this course have already helped hundreds of people feel safer in love.
With a 14-day guarantee, the only thing you’re risking is staying stuck in the same patterns for another year.
Instant access. No subscription. Pay once, keep it forever. 14-day money-back guarantee.
$249Get the Course